What Writers Do Between Projects. ;)

There are times when you are between projects, but you want to keep your creativity sharp. I love playing with words, but examples like these can have some, shall we say, unpredictable effects. Still, it’s good practice.

I recently posted these on my Facebook Profile Page and while they were generally received in the spirit they were intended, I raised a few eyebrows. Enjoy:

Note: When an actual Science Article inspires:

Top Story at this Hour:

In what has been considered the largest Landmark Case in Human History, The Moon has filed sexual harassment charges against The Earth in what can only be described as “unwanted massaging and inappropriate touching in the Workplace”.

The Celestial Body, Earth’s only natural Satellite, has described in their deposition an increase in physical stress, additional cratering in its southern region, and noticeable new fracture wrinkles in its most visible regions. Its lawyer had this to say:

“Since the earliest days of Civilization, my client has had to deal with leering from masses of people staring at it from ground level, performing lewd acts within its sight, and since the 1960s, has been penetrated and violated by manmade objects on a consistent basis. Even one US President has stated that going there was simply because ‘it’s there’. It’s a matter of public record. My client wishes only Justice.”

In other news, the Chinese Space Agency has announced, and this is a rough translation, that they “want to go there and break a piece off”.

There will be Full Coverage as this story develops….

Note: Here I was just screwing around…hehe:

And now for some Breaking News from the Channel 2 News Team….
Last night, an ambitious undercover operation centered around the container store, Bazongas, netted police officers with several prominent leaders of the notorious Seni Crime Family.

The container store, well known regionally for its catchy slogan, “you want to grab our jugs” had been the subject of an ongoing investigation into racketeering and the criminal manipulation of public assets.

Chief of Police Bobby Hooters held a press conference where he stated that “now that we’ve ripped the top off their organization, these boobs are flopping around aimlessly with nothing to support them. We expect to have them in hand in short order.”

We here at Channel 2 would like to commend our hard working law enforcement officials for their firm but fair handling of the situation. We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.


10 thoughts on “What Writers Do Between Projects. ;)

  1. You know, you remind me a lot of Italo Cavino πŸ™‚ You both can blend science and satire in very creative ways. If you haven’t checked out his book “Cosmicomics”, I think you would like it. It’s a bunch of short stories that are each based on some kind of scientific theory. One, for example, is based on the theory that life started in the sea and eventually migrated to land, and it documents a family whose uncle refuses to join them on land like a “civilized” person. All of the stories are very quirky and nonliteral like that, although some are much more high concept.

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    • Thanks, I appreciate the compliment. I’ve gotten most of my experience from being a smart ass and working a wide variety of jobs in my younger days. I enjoy thinking outside the box and while it hasn’t always yielded the most positive of results, things have never been dull and people, in general, seem to enjoy the humor. I will definitely look for Cosmicomics. Best wishes. πŸ™‚

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